One Year

8.13.2020

My Dearest Jeff,

I can’t believe a year has passed. I miss you so much at times my heart breaks. I miss what could have been – not so much what was – especially at times. I will always Love you to the depths of my Being.

 

I sit here looking at your ashes

A life lived with passion

A life of Love and friendship

A life of Brilliance

A lose tongue

A short temper

 

I got to spend a few years with you. So much passion, so much emotion, so many ups and downs. You were my best friend. For only knowing each other for a short time, we knew each other so well. We fit perfectly together. Perfectly, Imperfect we said. I’ve healed so much of my pain of “loosing” you from this physical realm. I thought I was doing so well, then I reached another level of pain when this week came. One year since you left.

I’ve heard so many motorcycles drive by this past week or so – one so loud it woke me up one night 😊 I smile, I cry, I see you in my mind with that crazy helmet on, I laugh.

 

You Loved fiercely. You were so passionate about everything.

I Love you so desperately and I release you.

I Release  I Release  I Release

I release the pain and guilt and shame

I release your human physical presence

I know you are always with me and always will be

 

You helped me remember how to stand up for myself and be strong and courageous once again. You helped me find me, remember ME. Know my worth. I’m trying to move forward remembering these things you helped me remember and know. At times I am strong and courageous and ready for anything. At times I am brave and ask for what I need and want. I am growing and expanding and learning.

 

I Honor you

I Honor your Memory

I Honor us

I Honor our time together

I Honor me

I Thank you

I Appreciate you

I’ve Love you for a Thousand years

I’ll Love you for a Thousand more

 

I am now going to open my heart to another. I know you approve. I feel your push to Love again. Love more. To Love Life and Live it.

I believe you had a hand in bringing him into my life in some crazy way.

I welcome Harmony Sweets into my Life.

What can bring more Love and Life into my life than a puppy?

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I welcome into my Life: Love, Peace, Joy, Passion, Excitement, Trust, Pride, Humor, Honesty, Acceptance, Respect, Beauty, Laughter and more

I Stand Tall and Proud of Who I Am ~ A Divine Being of Love, A Healer, A Wise Woman Sage, An Ancient one and so much more

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